Life was horrible at the time. The source of my problem- drug abuse! My aim in life then? I was hell bent on destroying it.
I drugged myself as often as I could and I stole all that I could put my hands on to obtain drugs. Drugs ruled my life. They became my friends. I found contentment in them and for a few hours a day I was free of anxiety and pain. Why had they become my friends? Because I had none! All my so called friends and family had vanished from the face of the Earth, when I needed them the most.
And so my journey deep into the abyss of drugs continued and so did my crimes. I was in a deep hole; too deep to crawl out of. I got caught, red handed stealing and as delirious as I was, I turned violent on the police force. I emptied all my bullets on them. Fortunately, no one was killed. That earned me the privilege of solitary confinement in prison.
My only possession – a small book, given to me, named ‘The Bible’. I was an atheist. At the time, I thought that all religions were a bunch of abracadabra or hocus-pocus! Too much solitude turned me to this book and I started reading. It was better then talking to the rats and cockroaches that surrounded me in my small cell.
I was going through my rehabilitation program during my imprisonment and many times I felt weak and miserable. I would have traded my right arm for a piece of rope, so that I could turn it around my neck and hang. The more wretched I became the more drawn to this small book with powerful words I became!
Then one night I heard a voice saying,” My son, you are not alone. Do not despair. I am your friend and I shall never abandon you”. Was I in a delirium state again? Whatever it was, I had never felt so loved before and I vowed never to forget that voice and that moment. I converted and swore to myself that once out of prison, I would do something good with my life.
Now I know that there is no one more special then God. I know that he shall always be my friend, my wall of support. He is and always will be my special friend!
Written by Jacqueline Sammut
(fiction story)
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